I was going to take a photo of my nails and upload...but the talons were so hideous that they are now hidden behind my all time personal safe favorite...emo black.
The grey is certainly representative of how I am feeling as arctic winds curl around the streets of melbourne and the misery of winter, however filmic, starts to sweep in. I think I would rather roll in the excrement of swine flu then go to work and make cold calls. I hate work. I wonder ...how I can turn around the current situation??? Should I light candles and chant middle eastern mantra's to bring inner sanctum? Breaking up my day by getting a coffee in the morning, going to lunch and sipping my earl grey tea in the afternoon are the rare moments I look forward to which I measure and punctuate my working day with. I wonder how I came to be in this role, abandoning most of my honed skill set and talents in favour of vacuous telemarketing and process driven drivel delivered from archaic shards of time where business was buoyant and shoulder pads accented tawdry marketing tag lines with neon abandon. It's mindless and my brain spores are evaporating by the second.
How does one deprive herself of so much? And enter the Russian...who disconnected shortly before Christmas and comes blatantly and expectantly back into my world. After months of mental rehabilition, I breathed a sigh as with conviction I came to the recognition he may not return and that I was over it. Not so ... as our reunion has been typically splintered by confusion, laughter, insults, aggression and magnetism. Unusually, this one individual has me suspend all common sense and logic as his often barbaric manner is spliced with kindess, interest and warmth which he so deftly tries to hide beneath past and unrelated hurt.
Life is easy for some, and not so easy for others. Yet emotional challenges that are presented pale in comparison to the pain and suffering others are going through and perspective is once again gained. Stuff can still kind of suck though...
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